Sunday, March 21, 2004

Join the New Millenium

Could someone please tell greeting card companies to join the new Millenium already! These are not the days of "Leave It To Beaver." There are more dysfunctional families then not.

My dad's birthday is in a couple of days. I went to the drug store earlier today to buy a card. Every single one I picked up was syrupy prose on little girls and their daddies. It's enough to make me puke! The one card I found that was somewhat adequate in its sentiment had a boy on the front. Uggg!

I don't have a normal lovey dovey relationship with either of my parents. And, I refuse to buy a card that speaks otherwise. I'm past the days when I look for cards that say "You sucked!" but jeeze could the card companies please cut us children of dysfunctional families some slack. Maybe something a little less flowery and full of praise. I'd settle for something like Happy Birthday Dad/Mom. Or... "It's Mother's Day. You're a Mother. So, here's your card. Now, I don't have to hear you gripe for the next year how no one sent you a card."

So, this year I played it safe for my Dad's card. The card is going to be late. So I got a Happy Belated Birthday card. They don't come with sentiment just a little joke, much more within my comfort zone. Maybe by Mother's Day the card companies will catch a clue. A girl can hope can't she?

19 comments:

freeepeace said...

I think you're on to something! There's a whole corner of the greeting card market that hasn't been touched [like Gregg]. How 'bout you team up with Aunt Nub & Geminiwilder and create those fabulous dysfunctional cards! Their cards are so cool, they wouldn't even have to say anything on them! My dad's birthday was/is this weekend - and well, it pretty much goes without saying but - he hasn't seen a card from me since I was forced to sign one in elementary school. :-\

gingergirl05 said...

That's true. I have a great relationship with my mom, so I would feel fine buying her the sentimental cards, but not my dad. I usually have a hard time finding a card for him. My father has actually bought me the same Christmas card 3 or 4 times now lol. Apparently he found one that said it right and so he just keeps buying it year after year. Some plain and simple cards would be nice! ~ Kate xo

itsjustusinnc said...

Oh I'm in the same boat. While I love my dad because he's my father (and trust me, that's the only reason), I could NEVER send him a sentimental card because I most certainly don't feel sentimental towards him. I forgot where I was going with this. Now *I'm* the one who needs sleep. LOL!

Gregg

lucylouladybug said...

I collect greeting cards, yes, a weird thing to be sure, but there are companies that have those types of greetings. Hallmark and American Greetings aren't in that catagory. I'll do a few searces for you for some of my sources.
Love, Penny

karensull12 said...

Perhaps you're on to something here. "Robbie's-Real-Life-Greeting-Cards" sounds good....

grodygeek said...

Robbie
Consider buying one of those printing software packages that permit you to create your own card using a color printer and card stock. The software costs about $40 and includes about a dozen disc of clip art. That way you could have a graphic of a happy loving couple and the words, "Gee, I love you dad, but as a father you still sucked."
Gordy
http://beta.journals.aol.com/grodygeek/The_Cycling_Comic/

queenz43 said...

Oh Robbie. I so love how you think!! LOL I think I would be a natural for the "Dysfunctional Card" business. Maybe it should be my home business idea. I will cut you in for the inspiration. ::still chuckling as she walks away thinking about the Mother's Day quote::
~RC~

debijanssen said...

YOU ARE SO RIGHT ON...I WASN'T LIKE THAT EITHER THEY ARE SO FAKE...DOES ANYONE REALLY FEEL THAT WAY? JUST KIDDING....CARD HUNTING IS HARD I USUALLY CHOOSE BLANK ONES AND RIGHT MY OWN MESSAGE.....

sethdellinger said...

Robbie...this entry is hilarious, and brilliant because it manages to be funny while discussing what some might consider a touchy or at least sore topic. Great!

lisbnjvi said...

I can totally relate Robbie! I never had good relationships with either parent and have been known to let out not so lady like snorts while trying to buy a mother's day card for my mother while standing in a CVS. You are correct though, the card companies should make one that just says "Happy Mother's Day" on the outside, and "Thank you for giving birth to me." on the inside. 'Nuff said!
Hugs and love, Lisa

rbushu said...

Good tip, Krob. The belated cards with 50% less sap. Making mental note now.

musenla said...

I have a fairly good relationship with my parents but I don't like those syrupy cards, either. I'm too old for them! I want something that reflects my evolving relationship with them, i.e. I'm an adult now too, so I don't call my father "Daddy", anymore, hello card companies?!

carolhehe said...

You know what kind of cards you ought to get, are the ones with a nice picture on the outside and totally blank on the inside. That way you can make up or write what you want to convey them. Like Happy Birtday and you can kiss my ass. Or Happy Birthday- You suck!
Gypsypaths

kathlyna22 said...

oh, I know your pain. I just buy the ones with pictures on the front , and blank on the inside. Eh, stupid cards
~Kathleen

quroboros said...

I dunno, I've noticed more realism & honesty in cards lately. Like instead of the standard cards, you can now get something like, "To my ex-stepmother" and "For a great granny/mother who raised me because Mom-was-a-junkie" card. (Ok, that's pushing it a bit.) For my sibs, I also choose ones that show a herd of pigs or swarm of locusts and says, "Are you SURE we're related?" ~Holly

bridgetteleigh75 said...

Yea....I think you're on to something, Robbie. There is a whole array of human dysfunction that hasn't been explored properly by Hallmark yet. Because, after all, you do want to 'care enough to send the very best. ' LOL

slowmotionlife said...

OK.. sad to say, but I totally get you on this. I can't even say why. It's just that not very many greeting cards represent anything I'd EVER say to my mom. We're close, but our relationship is NOT typical. I've found that buying blank cards, which you can write a little quote in and sign it "Happy Birthday" is as good as anything else. OR sometimes a small gift, instead of a card. Like a nice box of candies. It's sometimes easier to say things without saying them. Dunno. :(

krobbie67 said...

RC: Go for it! I really think it would work. My take would be cheap, just a few of the cards as freebies??

GORDY: Your suggestion is great! I even make cards but was in a time crunch and just wanted to pick something up to dash out in the mail.

KAREN: Thanks but I don’t think my cards would be ready for primetime. ;-)

PENNY: Ah, thanks! I’ve seen cards for Stepparents and what not but when you’re in a pinch at the drugstore the pickings are slim.

GREGG: I never remember where I’m going with anything. I just ramble and hope something worthwhile will be said when all is said and done. ;-)

GINGERGIRL – KATE: How funny about the same card! I save all my cards and have received duplicates from my Aunt & Uncle. Actually the pic was a duplicate but the words were different. LOL!

FREEE: Laughing at the Gregg dig!!! Thanks!

krobbie67 said...

SLO: My mother would have a kanipchin fit if she didn’t get a card. I think they are more important to her then the gifts. I like the idea of writing the quote in a blank card. I didn’t think of that. It might make the blank card acceptable.

BRIDGETTE: Indeed! LOL

HOLLY: Snorting with glee at your dysfunctional greeting card renditions.

MUSE: The thing that irked me was that all the cards talked about how the father provided guidance growing up and what-not. I don’t have that kind of relationship. Very frustrating! And, yes, we are women now! What about some mature sentiments?

RBUSHU: Yes, belated cards are the way to go! They are never sappy cause.

LISA: LOL! What the heck is a CVS?

SETH: Wow! Thanks! :::blushing:::

DEBI, GYPSYPATHS, KATHLEEN: I thought about buying a blank one but was concerned that it would be obvious why I chose a blank one.