Monday, March 29, 2004

Words

Thank you everyone for your kind words on the entry below. I've been in a strange mood this weekend. I usually don't write poetry under these circumstances but there it was inside of me so I started writing it down. I've never shared my poetry with anyone except once many years ago. I don't think it's very good. This stuff is a little different. I usually struggle to have things rhyme and have a pattern. You know, follow all the rules you learned in school.

Last week was a rough week. I don't expect this week to be much better. I have some challenges to face at work. Two employee evaluations to perform. One good, one not so good. It's the hardest thing about being responsible for people. Knowing that your actions, your words, will hurt them. Yet, not taking action hurts me. It's a lose-lose situation. I always strive to find win-win in my relations with people. I think I can buy her another month to turn things around but I fear it won't help and I'm just prolonging the inevitable. But, I'm also feeling worn out and don't want to go through the hassle of finding someone else right now. So, a month also buys me time.

I start my second session of classes on Tuesday. I sure hope these are a little easier. The two I just finished were grueling. The course material wasn't hard but the intensity of completing 16 weeks worth of work in 8 weeks, in some instances, is just overwhelming. After this, I'll have one elective Finance class to complete, which I can do after graduation.

I'm actually considering an independent study conducted under the direction of my creepy professor. I asked him a question regarding the company I work for and he suggested the independent study. I'd like to do it because it would be something real as opposed to all these hypothetical cases we are required to analyze. My by-product could actually have a productive use.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

I loved your WORDS. words are cool. :) when used in a postive way...
I love that poem above too. So freeform...love it! I have hard time with free form....but, I am trying.
good luck with your professor...just keep an eye out on him :)

Anonymous said...

I love your poetry!! It's beautiful. Sorry things are stressful for you at work. I would not like having to be hard on someone either, but sometimes it's necessary. Hang in there!!

Anonymous said...

Your poetry not very good? I beg to differ Robbie. The very first line: "Your words swallowed me", reeled me right in. I applaud you. As for work, I can understand the difficulty of your position but as with all things, this too shall past. As for school, I hope that your second sessions of classes leaves you a little more breathing room. To keep yourself going, just imagine your Graduation and the knowledge that all the sacrifices you have made for your education will be embodied in this moment. What a proud moment that will be!! Hope you are a bit rested before tackling classes tomorrow and hope in spite of what your week entails that it goes well.
Hugs,~RC~

Anonymous said...

Excellent idea about the independent study. Hope that pans out. And poetry - does it really need to rhyme? Or follow rules? What makes it poetry then? I never really understood that. Then again, I never really understand poetry. I figure, the more I DON'T understand it, the deeper meaning it has. ::shrug:: I'm more of the rhyme and rhythm kinda gal. Guess that's the musician in me. I can relate to your weekend - but hey, it's over! :) On to the next big venture - whatever that may be! :) xo

Anonymous said...

Hi Robbie, I can relate to the work situation. But for some reason mine has always worked out the easy way & the employee has chosen to leave without any action needing to be taken. I guess I lucked out on that part. I only had to help fire one coworker, but she was stealing money from the company. It was such a mess, the police were involved & such. But I didn't have to do the firing, I just had to be a witness because she was accusing our boss of sexual harassment.( Good grief this could be an entry all on its own. Sorry about that.) I wish you well and if it buys you a month to try & see if she is willing to turn her work around it might be worth it while you get through this next session of school..maybe just maybe she will see that she needs to get with the program.Jobs are hard to find these days.

My daughter wants to do independent study this summer...I am not sure she is disciplined enough for that. I hope everything works out how you want it to. I enjoy all your entries so much. Thanks for sharing. Kate.

Anonymous said...

If you can stand the creepy professor, I would do the Independent Study, I think you would learn and get so much more from that experience. Let me know what you decide! Kristi

Anonymous said...

It's always difficult to let people go, but look at it as doing them a favor. Perhaps she would perform better and be happier in a different job or company. As cold as it sounds, companies exist to turn a profit, and unfortunately employees not performing up to par cost them valuable man hours.

Robbie, I am excited for you. One more semester and you are DONE. Is the end of that rainbow looking any closer? It should, and that's all due to your hard work. You've done great, girl! =P

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the poem, Robbie...It`s Beautiful!!
I hope you`ll share more of your poems!!
Vince

Anonymous said...

I don't envy your position of responsibility. I was a charge nurse when I still lived in Charleston, and it about drove me insane. I'm not good at giving criticism...
But I certainly wish you luck with the task at hand.

As for your classes...hang in there, Robbie-girl. You're so close to the finish line!

Anonymous said...

Giving a not so good work review is never easy,and you have my good thoughts for handling it well. If dismissal is inevitable, you're giving her time, as well as yourself, to prepare for it as well, and that is a kind thing to do. I'd go for the independent study project. Analyzing a real situation is always much more rewarding ultimately than analyzing a theory.

Anonymous said...

I know how difficult management is. I'm such a peacemaker--I just wanted everyone to be happy, and truth is, you can't make everyone happy. You just have to do what is right. I know how you feel, it's not very good on your health either. And about your poetry. VERY good. I look forward to seeing more of your soul. That was incredible, Robbie!

Anonymous said...

Poems are known to pop up out of nowhere. I don't really believe that any *good* poet sits down and writes one in a methodic way. They have to be emotion-inspired to be done well.. and yours was very good.

You've got more school stuff coming up. Lots of work to do. I like the idea of an independent study, even if it IS under the direction of Mr. Creeps! Just steer clear of him. Or carry mace. Or both. LOL

Anonymous said...

SLO: Ah, thanks Mo! Stocking up on mace, indeed!

MIA: My soul? Eeeek !!! Had I only known I would reveal that? ;-)

SISTERCDR: What can I say? You’re right and you’re right!

BRIDGETT: A charge nurse has a lot more to contend with than my petty problems. You’ve got people’s lives to think about. Mmmmh I guess I do too but in a different way and that’s what bums me out. :-(

VINCE: I’ve never devoted much of myself to writing poetry. But, as it happens I’ll do my best to share. Thanks so much for your support. It means A LOT.

MUSE: You’re right about the profit aspect. It’s really how I look at it mostly because I’m all about saving money, even when it’s someone else’s. Thanks for the kudos! ::::blushing::::

KRISTI: So far, I’m pursuing the independent study but nothing’s definite in my book until it happens. Thanks for the advice!

Anonymous said...

KATE: When it’s a matter of ethics, firing for me is cut and dry. It’s the not meeting expectations that I get all wish-washy with. Yeah, I’m afraid about the disciplined part too! More that of my professor’s though than mine. I’m really enjoying your photos too! And, girl, you can leave a journal entry in at my place anytime!

FREEE: You not understand poetry!?! You’re a songwriter! Everything you write is poetry.

RC:  Yes, it will pass! ::::imagining graduation::::: Ah!!! Thanks!

KAREN: Thanks. I believe you studied English or Journalism in college??? So, I’m sure you know you’re stuff. As such, I feel humbled.

BABY: I’m surprised that you would have difficulty with freeform. You are sooo very talented. But, maybe it’s that you just don’t believe that what’s there is poetry.???